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This weekend I am heading north (yes, there is something North of where I live!) to do some kayaking and camping.  To some this might not seem all that exciting or interesting but for me this is a well needed break from my real life.  A fairly large group of us are going to kayak the sea caves on Lake Superior and then check out the ship wrecks with a ferry ride out to Madeline Island for an evening of fun at Tom’s Burnt Down Cafe.  I will be camping overlooking Lake Superior, cooking out and enjoying the simpler things in life.  And right now this is something that I really feel I need.

This was supposed to be a trip that Mark and I were going to do together but literally within 24 hours of him breaking things off a friend asked if I would be interested in going with her on the trip.  Initially I said no as I still felt down  but after having thought about how I shouldn’t give up on seeing something I really wanted to see because I couldn’t go with Mark I called her and said yes.  Although I can’t share this with Mark I think it is more of something that I need to do for me.  I have always wanted to see the sea caves in the summer months as I have seen them in the winter and they are amazing.  I have only seen pictures of the sea caves during the summer months and I really want to experience them during the summer.  I have also always wanted to see the ship wrecks located outside of Bayfield as well so how could I turn down the chance to do something that I have wanted to do for so many years.  Besides, it’s on my bucket list.

So, I’m off to play on the Big Lake with some wonderful people and see things that I have always wanted to see.  The picture you see is of the sea caves in winter.  I was with some of my favorite friends and my youngest.  ImageImageImage

Well, I have started work on my non-profit organization for victims of domestic abuse.  I am actually really excited and so far I have gotten tremendous amounts of positive feedback on the basic principles.  If I can save one person from ever having to go back to their abuser because they didn’t have a place to live once they were told they had to leave a shelter then I think that I was a success.  Hopefully this is an organization that will go national and with a little community spirit we will be able to keep these people from ever becoming a victim of abuse again and they will have a reliable income to sustain themselves and their families.

Now, let’s all cross our fingers and hope for a quick sale on my current home.  Once my home is sold I will be using my alternative building product home that I will be building as the model for my non profit organization.

Wish me luck!

Today I intend to work on getting my peace back.  Any break up is hard and for me a break up disrupts my inner peace.  When my inner peace is not where it should be I find that I don’t walk the dogs, skip my yoga practice and can’t seem to focus on much of anything.  I also find that small, little triggers cause me to remember things that we had done together or plans we had made.  It makes for a lot of tears and tons of time wasted sitting on my butt.

Today I am re-claiming my inner peace!  I don’t care how hot it is when I get home, I’m going to walk the dogs down to the lake for a swim~all 3 of us!  Then I will work them on their obedience and then I will do my yoga.  I will make myself a wonderful dinner and eat by candle light and appreciate what I will create for myself.  This part is hard but with some really wonderful friends and some of my own strength I will move forward and allow myself to grow.

Oh how I wish I could turn off my emotions and behave more like a man. Men seem to be able to turn off their emotions and just walk away. They never seem to feel that their partner deserves some kind of an explanation and that they are within their rights to just say something lame and hateful and just walk out.

Today I will allow myself to be sad and then I will move on.